Chapter 7
Daniel
More than a month had passed while Tiara had been staying in my house. Late one evening, I returned home wearily and completely drained of energy after work. Isma opened the door with Mila by her side.
"Daddy!" squealed Mila before giving me a welcoming hug as usual.
I smiled before trudging into the house and looking around. Dad, Mom and Tiara were seated in the living room of our house.
Tiara stared straight ahead at nothing in particular since she was blind while Dad and Mom turned to see me as I walked into the living room and said, "Hey."
"Hey, why're you so late, dear?" asked Mom.
"Nothing," I muttered as I shook my head and seated myself on the couch opposite to Tiara. Isma left the living room while Mila ran over to Mom, looking in awe at the fabric Mom was sewing.
I tried to face Tiara but my eyes were fixed on the carpet on the floor. How would I tell her the truth?
"Why, Daniel? Do you have something to tell me?" asked Tiara as she continued staring straight ahead.
I slowly looked up at her stunned. Despite being blind, she had always had the ability to sense my feelings ever since I knew her.
"Tiara, I've searched everywhere for him. I'm sorry but there's only one possibility... Darien is no more. I have asked almost all the people who might know him here in San Diego, and I have gotten just three different responses.
Some people said that they had heard that someone named Darien had died mysteriously two years ago, but they knew nothing more. Some told me that they have never even heard of the name Darien. But the rest of them, including the people in the company Darien worked in, just stared at me as though I were crazy, I don't know why, maybe because they know it's been two years since he died," I explained, "Even the police said that they had received a report about his death almost two years ago.
He had been admitted in a hospital after an accident, but at the hospital, he had been declared dead. I asked the police if they had a photo of the guy who had died in the accident, so I could at least show it to Mila to be sure whether it was Darien or not, but they didn't have any photos of him. So, there's only one possible conclusion, Tiara, your husband, Darien Caruso, is dead."
Without even flinching, Tiara nodded slowly in agreement, before standing up and walking back to her room in silence.
"Daniel, don't you have any feelings of sympathy for her? You're telling her that her husband is dead and you're talking so straightforwardly. Couldn't you at least have been a bit more subtle?" reprimanded Dad.
"The last time I tried to talk to her like that, she didn't even listen to me for a whole minute! She immediately asked, 'he's dead, right?' She's so straightforward, what am I supposed to do? So, I spoke to her straight to the point today, that's all," I justified.
"Daniel, she may be straightforward but it's your responsibility to get the point across to her in a way that hurts the least. Imagine how she would be feeling right now. How could you be so inconsiderate, Daniel?" asked Mom.
I sighed, before standing up and walking towards my room. I stopped in my tracks halfway and closed my eyes, as guilt cropped into my heart. "If there's a reason why I'm still alive, that's because of the tiny probability that Darien's still alive. But if... if he really is dead, the next day I'll be dead," Tiara's voice reverberated in my mind, saying the exact words she had spoken to me when I had first met her. No way! I could never let her do that!
I turned to my left to see the door to Tiara's room slightly open. I walked over to her room; Tiara was seated on the bed, just staring ahead. She wasn't crying and didn't even show any sign of her misery. She was just expressionless, as usual.
"Tiara... I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, Tiara. I know this is horrible. I can understand how hurt you must be now that..." I was speaking when Tiara interposed, "No, you don't. You don't know how I feel; and you will never know. You don't know me well enough, then how will you know how I feel?"
I stared at Tiara, astounded. She had never opposed me until now for any reason. She had never disagreed with me. What had happened to her now?
"No, Tiara. I'm sorry. I know how you must be feeling now. Of course I know you well enough. You've been..." I started, but she interrupted me again, "What do you know about me? I'm married to some guy named Darien Caruso and I've got a daughter, Mila Amylia. That's all you know about me. What more do you know? Do you know what kind of a person I am? Do you know anything about my life? Do you know how many people's lives I've ruined? Do you know how many people have died because of me? No, you don't. You don't know a thing about me."
"Okay, fine. I don't know anything about you, but that doesn't matter, Tiara. What I'm worried now is about you. What're you gonna do? Where're you gonna go?" I inquired.
"Oh yeah. I almost forgot I'm not a part of this family. Been living here for days, calling your parents Mom and Dad, and considering your sisters as my own, I'd forgotten that this wasn't my house or my family, and that I didn't belong here. Don't worry, Daniel, just leave me and Mila at the nearest bus stop when you're free," suggested Tiara.
"But, where will you go?" I asked in concern.
"I'll go somewhere... somewhere far from here, and I won't disturb you anymore. Don't worry," stated Tiara.
I stared at her speechless for a moment.
"Tiara, why don't you marry me?" I blurted out, before quickly justifying, "Don't you think you deserve a life? This is not the life you deserve, you deserve better. Why don't you... uh... marry me? I will look after you, Tiara, I promise. You like my family too, don't you? They all like you too. Why don't you just marry me then, Tiara? Will you marry me?"
She remained still and forbiddingly silent as she just continued staring ahead, expressionless.
"You're asking me, Daniel? Have you forgotten that you're supposed to be marrying Narissa in two weeks? And you're asking me this? What do you even know about me, huh?" demanded Tiara.
"Narissa will surely be able to find someone else... but you? With Mila, it's gonna be hard for you. And you need to get over Darien too. And I strongly believe, you deserve a better life than your misery."
"I don't deserve a better life, don't you get it? You... you don't even know me. You don't know anything about me, do you? Do you know about my life before I got married to Darien? Do you know how many people have died because of me? My father, my mother, Darien and how many more I myself don't know. Do you know how many people's lives I've ruined? All of theirs and Rats.
I ruined Rats's life. My own brother... the person whom I had considered like my own brother. I ruined his life. And you want to marry me? Are you... are you mad? Why can't you marry Narissa? What's wrong with her? She's perfect in every single way I know. She's surely a much better person than me. If only you knew my background, you would just hate me. Be glad you're gonna get such a nice wife like Narissa."
"Tiara, why don't you understand? I'd rather get married to you than to a person like Narissa!"
"Why? Why, Daniel? Because she's childish? Please, Daniel, she will mature once she's married. I can assure you that. The fact that Narissa Eliza is childish is an utter lie. It's not at all true. She's just pretending to be childish. And that will change when you marry her, she'll show you what a nice person she is. You can't have a more perfect wife than Narissa, you know?"
"Yeah, right! I'll believe that! Are you telling me that I don't know Narissa? I know her longer than you and I know her well enough! I do not wish to marry a girl like her! If you wish, I will marry you, Tiara. I am willing to marry you anytime, and if you want time, I am ready to wait for you all my life. I mean it, Tiara, you can trust me!"
"Huh? You don't even believe what I say, then how can I even actually trust you? How do you expect me to marry you? And why should I marry you? I don't want to marry you. I will never marry a man like you for sure. Besides, I'm already the wife of another man. I am a wife and a mother. Darien and Mila are enough for me. I will never accept anyone other than Darien in my life.
You may have reminded me of Darien once in a while but you are still not my Darien. You are a totally different person with a totally different attitude. Not at all like Darien. You always think only about yourself, you never care about anyone else. You never try to understand how anyone else feels. You agreed to marry Narissa, yet you're thinking along the lines of marrying me instead without even consulting your family or Narissa and her dad."
"Yes, I agreed to marry her, I know, but that was because the situation at that time was different."
"So? So what? You gave your word; you ought to marry Narissa, no matter what happens. What kind of a person are you, seriously? You don't keep to your word, you don't care about others. Really, I feel pity for Narissa to have to marry a man like you of all people."
I stared at Tiara, stunned for a moment. Did she really hate me that much? What had I done to deserve that?
"Why? Was Darien really such a perfect man? A perfect husband?" I fumed enviously.
"Yes, he surely was. Compared to you, he definitely was," confessed Tiara.
"Oh, really? Was he really such a perfect man? What did he do to make you think he's so perfect compared to me, huh?" I demanded.
"The most important aspect, the hugest difference between you and him is that he never hurt anyone's feelings no matter what happened. He was always calm, patient and understanding. No matter how angry or miserable he was at any point in his life, he had always suppressed his own emotions, portraying himself as though he was unperturbed. Never had he let anyone else other than me know his real emotions. Not even when his own brother had betrayed him. Never.
See the difference? He never opposed anyone no matter what they said. He never raised his voice on his own brother, despite being hurt by him. He always agreed to anything anyone said, unless he knew it was bad or wrong. Then, he would explain it to them nicely, not shout at them; unlike you who shouted at Uncle Harris just because he gave me a blank cheque and told me to leave."
I stared at her, shaken by her words. Before I could even think of a reply, Tiara spoke again.
"One more thing, Darien never went against his word. If he ever gave anyone his word, he ensured that he fulfilled it. Except for one. And that was not because he couldn't fulfill it or didn't want to fulfill it, but because he was not allowed to fulfill it. He had assured me that he would be right by my side the next day morning; that is, the day after Mila was born. But his life was taken away before he could reach by my side at the hospital.
And you? You agreed to marry Narissa, at least a few months ago. Just because you found me, you want to marry me instead of Narissa, even though I'm blind and I have a daughter. No thank you, I do not wish to marry a man like you."
"Fine! If you really want me to marry Narissa, fine! Go tell my parents that I'm ready to marry her in two weeks, as per their wish! Go tell them that, if you really want to ruin my life too, by getting me married to her!" I hollered, before storming out of the room.
"Daddy!" Mila called out from the living room, just as I walked out of Tiara's room, seething furiously.
I stopped in my tracks. Daddy? Her mother had just pointed out the differences between me and her father, and she was calling me 'Daddy'?
"Daddy, can you play with me?" asked Mila innocently, as she ran towards me.
"Stop calling me Daddy, will you? I'm not your Daddy! Your Daddy is dead! D.E.A.D. Dead! Go ask your mother if you really want another Daddy! But just stop calling me Daddy, okay? Because I am not your Daddy! Your Daddy is dead! Long dead! So you better just stop calling me Daddy from now and get lost! I've had enough of you and your mother!" I bellowed and stalked off to my room.
"Daddy...? Why're you angry with me, Daddy? I'm sorry, Daddy," Mila mumbled softly as she watched me enter my room and slam the door with a loud bang, without bothering to listen to a word of what she had said.
To be continued...
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