Promise To A Stardust (Published Under Flutter Fic)
Kabanata 18
Kabanata 18
BINUKSAN ko ang wallet para silipin ang ID at kung sapat ba ang cash na dala ko nang dumulas iyon sa kamay ko. I gasped when the coins rolled under the bed.
I grunted and opened my phone's flashlight, kneeling to look for it under the bed.
Naabot ko na 'yon nang saktong mahuli ng tingin ko ang kulay pulang box sa ilalim. Kinuha ko rin iyon bago naupo sa kama para silipin.
I opened it and saw handwritten letters!
Hi, Reev!
This is my first letter to you. It's been a month since I first saw you. I remembered thanking those who hurt me instead of getting mad because I met you at the hospital. You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. I like you, would you like to have a date with me?
Gwapong basagulero,
Caspian
Nakagat ko ang labi nang maalala bigla no'ng inabot niya sa akin ito. He was so shy that day, namumula pa at nauutal habang ibinibigay kasama ang tatlong rosas at ang pabaon niyang adobo at tokwa.
Babe,
How would I start this? I just wanted to thank you for letting me court you. After annoying you for weeks, you finally said yes to my love. Anyway, I just want to say that your lips are sweet, I can't wait to see you again and kiss you.
You're the best part of my everyday. I love you.
Gwapo mong suitor,
Caspian
There was even a notebook with dead roses slipped in between the pages! May mga petsa pang nakalagay kung kailan ko iyon natanggap.
Babe kong maganda,
I was preparing a surprise for you, hoping you'll finally say yes after months of courting and you never failed me. Thank you!!! (Maraming exclamation because I'm fucking happy). Thank you for making me the happiest man on earth. Promise I will be worth your yes!
PS: Forgive my handwriting, nagsusulat ako sa CR mehehe! (Cute no, parang goat.)
I love you, mwuah mwuah!
Gwapo mong boyfriend,
Caspian
The bitter-sweet memories played in my mind like they had only happened yesterday. It made me mourn what-ifs and what-could-have-beens.
Inabot ko ang kulay pulang kahon na nasa pinakagilid at binuksan. I saw a gold plain band inside, it was the engagement ring he gave me when he proposed. Maybe it was Dad who kept it here.
I smiled bitterly and sighed.
Hindi na maibabalik ang nakaraan. I have to move forward, free myself from pain and start again somewhere.
I had to.
*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚
SA Casa Amara dadaong ang yate na magdadala sa 'min sa isla kaya wala akong choice kung hindi ang magtungo ro'n.
It was a very busy resort with tourists from all over the world. I remembered going here so often with Caspian. I'd check myself in as a guest so as not to make people suspect my connection with Caspian.
The Estradas were a big family name in this small province. They basically ran the politics here kaya no'ng panahong 'yon ay hindi ako kampante na may matang makakakita sa amin ni Caspian. Ayokong isugal ang kaligtasan namin.
Caspian, of course, is currently training here to inherit the resorts kaya kapag tapos ng trabaho niya o kaya kahit 'di pa nga ay nasa akin siya uuwi.
We'll be in his massive suite on the top floor. As much as he could, he's working there to be with me, sasabay sa pahinga ko, walang sawang lulutuan ako. Sometimes, if the stars were bright, we'd sit by the pool to stargaze, waiting for shooting stars to wish.
He just became bold when he couldn't take hiding me in public anymore. Ayaw niya raw na itinatago ako kaya ayon, kagaya no'ng nanliligaw pa siya'y walang-hiya na namang nagpaparada ng gwapong pagmumukha niya sa ospital.
"Next please," tawag ng security sa scanning area papasok sa waiting area ng yate.
Pagkaraan ko sa scanner at pagkuha ng bag ay natigilan ako nang magbukas ang elevator sa gilid at lumabas si Caspian.
He's grumpy. Alam ko na kaagad ang kislap ng mata niya. Malamig, seryoso, igting ang panga at bagsak ang buhok na madalas nakaayos kapag nasa trabaho siya. Nahuhulog ang hibla no'n sa noo niya na ayos niya lang kapag bago gising siya o kaya'y walang lakas mag-ayos kasi masama ang pakiramdam niya.
He looked good as always in his business attire, a navy blue coat, black slacks, and shiny leather shoes. Kasunod niya ang ibang business man na may sinasabi pero napunta lang sa 'kin ang atensyon niya.
His face brightened, parang nakakita ng star sa pasko. Lumitaw ang ngiti niya pero nag-iwas na ako at hinatak ang bagahe.
I rolled my eyes when the baggage vanished from my hand.
"What are you doing?" I scoffed and looked behind me.
"Alis ka na, Reev?" maamong tanong niya.
Hindi kaagad ako nakasagot, iniikot ko ang tingin sa paligid at napansing napakatahimik ng mga tao, gulat na gulat.
"Anong ginagawa mo?" Sita ko kay Caspian at akmang kukunin ang maleta pero inilayo niya.
"Hatid kita?" he answered lightly.
Napansin ko ang pagkakagulo ng ibang guest at staff. May iba pang mukhang kumukuha ng picture ata kaya nagtago ako ng bahagya.
"No!" I hissed quietly. "Nakakahiya, look at the people around you!"
He stopped, nangunot ang noo niya at napatingin sa paligid. Then, his aura turned dark again.
"What are you looking at?" Malamig niyang sinabi. "Back to work!" Biglang nagkumahog ang mga tao at nagsibalikan sa ginagawa.
I blinked, sa muling pagharap kay Caspian ay mukha na naman siyang maamong tupa.
"Okay na, Reev." He smiled.
"Oh, God." Nasapo ko ang noo. "Leave me alone," I said instead and took the baggage pero nakipag-agawan na naman siya sa akin.
"Ako na, tulungan kita." Hindi siya nagpatalo.
"Isa, Alcantara!" I hissed.
"Reev," he whined like a kid pero nahatak ko sa kanya ang maleta at nag-walk out.
Dinig ko ang yapak pasunod sa 'kin. Naglakad ako palabas sa port nang nakuha na naman niya ang maleta ko.
"Caspian, sinasabi ko nang–" I froze when I saw someone else instead of Caspian. "Rix?"
"Hi, Lars," he greeted.
It was my college crush! We somehow had a thing but when he attempted to court me, I turned him down because I'm not ready yet after Claude.
"It's been a while! Kumusta?" I beamed.
"Great, you?" He roamed his gaze on my face. "Mas gumanda ka, Polaris."
My cheeks flushed. I chuckled.
"No!" I shook my head. "Ano ka ba?"
"I believe I get to carry that," muntik pa akong mapatili sa gulantang nang biglang lumitaw ang kabuteng Caspian sa gilid ko.
Kunot ang noo niya, iritado at seryoso habang nakatitig sa kausap ko.
"Cas," I called.
He looked at me flatly, even grumpier! Suminghap ako sa gulat nang walang pasubaling kunin niya ang bagahe ko mula kay Jerix at hinila paalis.
I shook my head when he pulled my baggage, nagdadabog.
"Uhm, Rix." Lumingon ako sa kanya na nagtataka sa kilos ni Caspian.
"You know him?" aniya.
"Yes, unfortunately." I made a face.
"Polaris Reeva!" Napatalon ako sa sigaw ni Caspian. Nang nilingon ko ay nanliliit ang mata niya at halos umusok na ang ilong habang iritadong nakatingin.
"Uhm, uuna na ako–"
"One, two... Itatapon ko sa dagat 'tong gamit mo!" He groaned like a foolish, spoiled brat.
I waved at Rix, halos takbuhin na si Caspian na umirap sa akin at ngumuso. Nang maabutan ay mabilis na binatukan siya at sinuntok sa braso.
"Ano bang problema mo, huh?!" I hissed.
"Is that the asshole you're talking about? The one in college–"
"Jerix is not an asshole!" I snickered. "Umayos ka nga! Ano'ng nangyayari sa 'yo?"
"I'm jealous!" He hissed. Natigil ako. "Kapag sa kanya nakangiti ka, bakit sa akin, hindi? Ano bang mayro'n sa kanya? Mas gwapo naman ako, tapos ang bait-bait mo pa sa kanya tapos bakit kapag sa'kin–"
"Nagseselos ka?" Natawa ako.
"Oo!" He confessed shamelessly. "Akala mo ba hahayaan lang kita na umalis na lang kasi sabi mo? I won't–"
"Walang tayo, Caspian," I snapped.
Nahulog ang panga niya.
"K-kahit na–"
"Stop being jealous, wala ka namang karapatan."
Mas nalukot ang mukha niya. "'Yonn nga," lumiit ang boses niya. "Kaya nga ako mas nagseselos dahil wala akong karapatan."
I walked out. Sumunod siya at hinuli ang kamay ko. He tugged me gently.
"What are you doing?"
"P-pahawak lang, Reev," ungot niya.
Hinayaan ko na lang at ayaw ko nang gumawa ng drama. Pinagtitinginan na kami at binabati siya ng ibang nakilala siya pero tumatango lang siya, nakahawak lang sa kamay ko nang mahigpit.
He was gripping it as if his life depended on it, like it was the last time he'd got to hold it. Maybe it is. I don't think we'll see each other again after this.
He squeezed my palm and caressed my fingers, nagtagal iyon sa palasingsingan kong bakante. Dahil do'n ay napansin kong may singsing siyang suot.
Is that...
I looked away. Mabuti na lang ay nakadaong na ang yate at makakaalis na ako.
Nakasunod siya sa 'kin, bitbit pa rin ang maleta ko.
"Caspian, the asshole." Sabay kaming natigilan nang may lumitaw na lalaki.
"Fucker," Caspian hissed, natawa ang huli at pagkatapos ay nag man hug sila.
The man is wearing a white uniform and a cap. He looked like a captain. Umaawang ang labi ko nang mapagtanto kung sino iyon.
"Lucian?" I called.
He looked at me, his deep black eyes widening.
"Polaris?!" He exclaimed then looked at Caspian. "You actually found her?! Finally, couz!"
He looked at the two of us.
"Nagbalikan na kayo?!" Nanlaki pa ang mata niya sa tuwa pero ngumiti lang ako ng maliit sa kanya at umiling.
"No," I denied.
"Oh..." His mouth parted. He glanced at Caspian, shaking his head with disappointment.
"You fucked up again, man,"
Caspian lowered his head.
"Uhm, anyway..." Kuha ko sa atensyon nila. "Maybe, I should go? Ilalagay ko lang ang gamit ko."
Tumango si Lucian. "Let me help you, Lars."
"No," ani Cas. "Ako na."
"Oww, alright." Humalakhak si Lucian at itinaas ang kamay. "The floor is yours, kamahalan."
I waved at Lucian goodbye while Cas followed me. Inilagay niya ang maleta ko sa designated place bago ako hinarap.
"Salamat," tipid kong sinabi.
He was just staring at me with those longing and sorrowful eyes, fisting and unfisting his hand. Matikas siya't puno ng awtoridad pero tuwing kaharap ko'y parang nauupos na kandila, tila nawawala at handang yumukod kung iuutos ko.
"You're really going? You'll... level me?" the pain didn't escape his voice.
"Vacation," I corrected. "But maybe, this will be the last time we'll see each other."
Mas namungay ang mata niya. "Bawal na rin akong... silipin ka?"
I sighed.
"Let me get this straight, Cas. As much as possible, ayoko nang makipag-usap. I wanted to move forward and seeing you might not be a good thing right now."
He nodded, still hopeful.
"But can I still pursue you? Kahit itaboy mo ako, ayos lang. I-I just..." He sighed. "Ayoko lang kasing malayo ka, gusto kong sumubok pa ulit. Baka p'wede pa...
"Cas..." I shook my head. "H'wag na natin ipilit."
"B-but..."
"Sorry." I bit my lip. "I hope you understand."
Ilang segundo siyang 'di nagsalita, malalim ang iniisip hanggang sa tumango.
"I hope some other day, we could see each other again," he whispered.
"I hope so, just not today, Cas. M-maybe, someday."
Ang bigat-bigat ng pakiramdam ko. It hurts to bid goodbye to someone who's always been a part of your everyday that it felt heavy. 'Di ko na napansin na may kumawala na ring luha sa 'kin.
"R-Reev," he panicked and cupped my cheek. "Shh, babe, please don't cry," pakiusap niya.
"Ang hirap naman no'n, Cas," I breathed. "Hindi naman ako m-manhid. Pinapaalis kita pero 'di ibig sabihin no'n ay wala na akong pakiramdam. I once loved you."
Namungay ang mga mata niya. I felt the tremble in his palm on my cheek and he didn't say anything as he pulled me close.
Niyakap niya ako, mahigpit.
"M-mahal na mahal kita, Reev," he muttered. "You are the only woman I will love this much. Ikaw lang."
Naging mabigat ang pakiramdam ko nang umandar na paalis ang yate mula sa port ng Casa Amara at pinapanuod ang unti-unting paglayo nito kung nasaan si Caspian na pinapanuod ako.
Kahit sa malayo ay kita ko ang pagkislap ng mga luha niya.
To calm myself, inilipat ko ang atensyon sa madilim na karagatan at ang liwanag at kislap na nakikita ro'n mula sa mga bituin.
The Sea of Thieves, that's what they call it.
"Lost island, huh?" Sa paglingon ko ay nakita ko si Rix kaya nanlaki ang mata ko at napangiti.
"Rix?! You're going too?" I exclaimed.
"Yeah." He winked. "I guess fate had ways for us to meet again, don't you think?" He smiled.
The island is magical. When I got there, it was as if I had been there for the first time. The white sand, the salty fresh air, and the scent of moisture and trees refreshed me.
Kaunti lang ang kasama sa tour kaya tahimik. Nagtungo kami sa mga cabana at dahil gabi na'y 'di rin naman makakapag-ikot kaya dumiretso na ako para magpahinga.
*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚
THERE was a week timeframe where we could relax on the island before we went island hopping the following week. Kasama ko si Jerix na nag-agahan at nag-ikot-ikot.
It was a great place to unwind, it felt like you were being a part of nature. It's refreshing.
From the pristine clear blue sea, to the white sand beaches, to the rock formation and trees–it was just perfect.
Habang naglalakad-lakad ay napansin ko ang isang nakadaong na yate sa may dalampasigan kaya lumapit ako.
"Lars?" Nilingon ko 'yon.
"W-Wave?" My eyes widened.
He's still the same, handsome as ever but his eyes... it's different, it's blue and brown now!
"Your eyes..." Turo ko.
"Long story." He smiled. 'Di na ako nakiusyoso.
"How are you?" I asked. "It has been so long since I last saw you! It's been what? Months already? Balita ko graduate ka na raw!"
"Yeah." He nodded. "No'ng nakaraan lang."
"Congratulations!" I beamed. "I'm proud of you!"
"Thank you, Polaris." He glanced at the yacht and back to me. "Anyway, you? How are you coping up?"
"Not easy but I have to survive this." I shrugged.
Napatitig siya at mukhang may gustong sabihin pero 'di itinuloy.
"What is it?" I asked. He sighed.
"Caspian's a mess, Lars," he informed. "Ayaw lumabas sa hotel 'yong gago, doon na ata titira habang-buhay."
Just the mere mention of him made me ache.
"He can do it," I muttered. "He'll be better in time. He'll move on."
"I don't think so. Warrion said he's been drinking and crying all the time, ginagawang bar at bahay na ata 'yong hotel niya."
Doon na nagsalubong ang kilay ko.
"He...what? Why would he do that?"
"Baliw na baliw ang pinsan ko sa 'yo, Polaris. Gago nga lang pero sigurado kong mahal na mahal ka no'n at nagsisisi siya sa mga nagawa niya noon."
"Wave!" We stopped when we heard a voice, sabay kaming napalingon sa yate at nakitang may babae.
She looked like an angel in her dress. Her eyes were pristine blue, like the waves.
"My girlfriend," ani Wave kaya napangiti ako.
Bagay sila.
Niyaya ako ni Wave paakyat sa yate. Napansin kong may matangkad na lalaking umalis, mukhang kausap no'ng girlfriend ni Wave kanina.
"Baby, this is Polaris," he introduced. The woman remained looking at me, curious and a bit guarded.
She's cute! Napangiti ako, nagsusungit pero maamo ang mukha.
"And Lars, this is my future wife, Zirena," aniya.
Nagulat ang girlfriend, nawalan ng poise, namumula. Natawa ako.
"Nice meeting you, Zirena," bati ko.
"N-nice meeting you, too." We shook hands.
When they left, I resumed strolling the island. I watched the sunset and lay on the shore with my blankets, stargazing and naming the stars in my head.
I smiled as I found the brightest one. I lifted my hand to pretend I could reach it.
"Hi, Castor," I muttered as I felt a warm tear cascading down my skin. "I know you're watching over us, anak. Thank you."
*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚
"LARS?" I went to the door and found Jerix outside with his simple shirt and khaki pants.
"Hi, Rix!"
"Good morning," bati niya. "Ready? Naroon na ang tour guide sa may dalampasigan."
"Yes!" I beamed, taking my bag and fixing my sundress. "Saan daw first location natin?"
"That, we will find out. Let's go?" Inilahad niya ang kamay which I gladly took. Nakaalalay siya sa akin patungo sa dalampasigan kung nasaan ang ibang mga turista.
Jerix is still handsome just like in college. He had this boy-next-door aura kaya nagging crush ko.
Nakahawak sa baywang ko si Jerix, nakaalalay habang naglalakad kami sa may dalampasigan. Abala naman ako kakapaikot ng tingin, binubusog ang mga mata sa 'di nakakasawang tanawin.
"Damn, girl! I told you he's hot!" I overheard the blonde girls giggling while taking photos of I guess... the view?
"Watch out, I'll probably bring him inside my cabin when we got back!" ani no'ng mestisa na mapula ang labi.
'Di lko na pinansin at niyaya si Rix papunta sa umpukan ng mga turista na nakikinig sa sinasabi ng staff.
"And he's gonna be our tour guide for today," ani ng matanda at may inilahad sa tabi.
I shifted my face and I swear the oxygen left my lungs when I saw Caspian's glaring green eyes piercing at me!
I blinked, bumaba ang tingin niya mula sa akin pabalik sa kamay sa baywang ko at umigting ang panga.
Wala sa sariling hinawi ko ang kamay ni Jerix paalis.
Fuck! Bakit ako kinabahan?!
"Lars?" Baling niya sa akin pero alanganin lang akong ngumiti at umiling.
"W-wala lang, makati kasi ang tagiliran ko." Nagpanggap akong kumakamot.
Caspian smirked. Mayabang na pinasadahan niya ang daliring bagsak at ginugulo ng hangin. He's wearing a white dress shirt, bukas ang tatlong butones sa may dibdib kaya hantad ang parte no'n!
He shot his brow up maliciously when he caught me. I rolled my eyes.
Gago!
"Uhm, Sir, introduce yourself to the tourists," ani no'ng matanda no'ng napansing distracted ni si Alcantara.
Caspian looked away coolly, smiling cockily at everyone.
"Hello, you can call me Caspian or Cas. I'll be your tour guide for today. Please be good to me." He even bit his lip.
The girls giggled, naghampasan pa roon sa tabi na halatang-halata at naghilahan pa ng buhok!
Aba, aba! Anong gusto n'yo? Ako na lang manghila, o! Para wala nang matirang buhok?!
"Okay, you can all proceed and go to the boats," ani no'ng matanda.
Nag-iwas ako ng tingin.
What is the jerk doing here?! Sabi ko tapos na, a!
"Reev ko!" Halos masapo ko ang noo nang banggain niya si Rix sa tabi ko paalis at siya ang pumalit at mabilis na humawak sa braso. "Musta sa Dubai? Na-miss kita rito sa Pinas."
Napakamot ako ng kilay.
"Ano'ng ginagawa mo rito, Alcantara?" mariing tanong ko.
"Tour guide?" He answered innocently. "Bago kong raket?"
"Seriously?" Nagpamaywang ako at tinitigan siya. "Ang dami mong trabaho! 'Yong totoo, ano ba talagang natapos mong kurso, Alcantara?"
"Hmm..." Napaisip pa siya, humahawak sa chin niya.
Suddenly an imaginary light bulb seems to appear somewhere.
"Bachelor of Business Administration, major in pleasing you," masayang sagot niya. Sa inis ko ay sinipa ko ang paa niya at hinila ang naguguluhang Jerix sa gilid.
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