Love Loss
Khloe's POV:I took a step back after having set down the last book of my collection on the desk.That made eight books total, neatly lined up in two rows of four.Recently, I've been spending a lot of the time that Nico's away in the library reading.Reading romance books to be exact.As embarrassing as it sounded, I had no idea how to properly be in a relationship and I needed some advice.Most girls would just ask their moms or sisters but that wasn't really an option for me.I thought about asking Lily, but what no average pet would ever need relationship advice and she might get suspicious.And the embarrassment I got just thinking about asking Nico threw that idea out almost immediately.Needless to say, I had no idea what I was doing.So far it seemed like our relationship was going fine, but I just wanted to make sure and know how to progress with him properly.I really didn't want to mess this up, especially now that Nico had all of these dates to go on.He was on his first one right now, in fact.I tried not to dwell on it and focused back at the task at hand.Looking for my answers in fiction romance books written by vampires wasn't exactly the most reliable of sources, but this was all that I had.And I actually learned quite a bit about how vampire relationships differed from humans.I didn't know before that vampires fed from each other as an act of expressing their love and trust.Maybe I should ask Nico about that at some point.I placed my hands on the desk and leaned forward a bit, glancing over every title.I had read through every single one of these and marked the pages that I felt might be important.Every first kiss, every first 'I love you', every little interaction that stuck in my brain, every first time things got... sexual.I marked those last ones, but almost always skipped over them.Id get embarrassed just reading it.As for the first two subjects, I was surprised how the 'I love you' came soon if not directly after the first kiss.Was that normal in the vampire community?Or in any relationship?My shoulders slumped as I lifted up the book where both happened on the same page.Turning to that page I read it.He kissed her, it was just a small and simple brush of the lips before he proclaimed his love to her.I thought back to my first kiss.How it happened in such an unlikely time and how it came so naturally to me once his lips met with mine.I had a gut feeling that if the situation had been different, our first kiss would have been a lot longer.And even if he wanted to proclaim his love, that wouldn't have been the right time.I guess a couple days later we kind of confessed our love, but he never actually said that word.He's never said that word.I honestly didn't know why this was bothering me so much.I knew that these were just stories and that every relationship was different, but... I don't know.He was patient with everything in this relationship, and never tried to rush anything, so maybe that was it.We haven't been doing this for that long, so... this was fine then, right?I sighed as I plopped myself down onto the desk chair, setting the book in my lap and setting my head in the palms of my hands.This was such a stupid thing to be worried about, yet I couldn't get my mind off of it.I was so scared of messing this up somehow and I guess now with all of his arranged dates, I guess I just wanted some sort of assurance.The way he treats me should be assurance enough. It is assurance enough, but then why do I feel so worried?They're just words. Three little words.Love... What a strange concept.I don't even think I knew what the word meant.Id like to think I do, but I'm not really sure.Did I love Nico?I pondered that over for a moment.I think I did. If that strange pull to him and that warm feeling I got whenever I laid eyes on him wasn't love, then I didn't know what it was.That safety I feel whenever I'm around him and how every moment spent with him is one that I want to keep with me forever...I think I loved him...But was this happening too fast? Was I just being naive?My thoughts were cut short by a sudden crashing noise coming from a nearby bookshelf, followed by the sound of a couple book hitting the ground."Shit!" A familiar voice exclaimed, partially hushed.Curious, I stood, holding the book in my lap close to my body as I went to investigate.What I saw once I turned the corner of the bookshelf where I had gotten all of my romance books, I froze at what I saw.Xander was frantically picking up and putting back the books that had somehow found themselves on the ground.He paused right in the middle of putting the last book back once he spotted me, his eyes wide."Oh uh- Hey Khloe, what's up?" he asked, rubbing the back of his head nervously.I opened my mouth to respond, but stopped short once I spotted the book that he held under his other arm. A book that I definitely recognized from the eight that I had read.I failed in stopping the half-suppressed laugh that forced its way out of my mouth, my hand shooting up to cover my mouth once it did.Xander quickly glanced down to the book he held, a little blush of embarrassment tinting his face.He too, opened his mouth to say something, but then his eyes landed straight onto the book I was holding.My eyes widened as I quickly made sure that my arm was covering the title of the book.We just stood in silence for a little bit before he finally spoke."Ok listen, I didn't see you here, and you didn't see me here. Deal?" He offered."Deal," I responded with a nod, partially relieved that he wasn't going to question my book choice.He was probably happy that I wasn't questioning his.It was a good book, probably my favorite out of the eight. I hope he enjoys it."Good," he practically sighed out before walking towards me."See ya around then, Khloe," He said as he walked past me, lightly ruffling my hair with his hand as he did.I turned my head to where he had gone, hoping that he wasn't going to walk by the desk I was using.Well... that was certainly a conversation I never could have imagined I'd have with Xander a couple months ago. Or in general, really.Whatever. Xanders change was strange but I wasn't complaining.He seemed happier this way.I short exhale brushed past my lips as I instinctively placed my hand over his bite mark as the memory flashed through my mind.What an interesting vampire.Turning my head back, I walked a couple steps forward and placed the book in my hold back on its place on the shelf.I wonder if Nico is done with his date yet.
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: ZingTruyen.Xyz