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The nearest pack was a two-hour walk away.
Sansa started there.
Though she would never admit it out loud, she didn't like to shift. There was something about the nature of the wolf that almost...frightened her. The power of the body, the force of the creature- all of it left her in awe, but she felt completely useless when using it.
Like she didn't belong there.
She knew it would take time since she was new to the process, but she preferred the way the world was still and peaceful in the human eye. Not the black and white vortex of the wolf. Not the almost savage air of survival that came upon her when taking the animal's skin. The simplicity of thought and life fell into a rigid category of what was necessary and not necessary- and Sansa thought that the skin of the wolf was suited more for the minds of those who sought power and advantage over their hearts, than people who wanted rest and peace.
Maybe.
Again, she was still inexperienced, and rarely did those outside of the warrior's circle ever have a need to shift. Some went years without changing, forgoing the ways of the wolf and casting aside the fur of the animal.
Sansa knew better.
She knew it was a part of her.
So it was with great reluctance that she stripped within the forest, closing her eyes and feeling the change take over her.
The two-hour walk quickly fell into under an hour.
At the edge of the woods lining the other pack, before she could scent the line where the border patrol roamed, she changed back and began walking on two feet.
Warren had warned her ahead of time that it was wise to be in skin when entering foreign packs. Some did not give time to explain and assumed without thought that any wolf outside their land was a rouge.
That was technically what Sansa was now though.
She smiled at the thought, thinking herself very similar to Night now.
Like her, she also did not belong to a pack.
At the thought of Night, her heart fell. A sadness came into her, one that she couldn't throw aside. It might have been that scent of sorrow that caught the attention of the passing border patrol as he called out for her to stop.
Sansa did as told, not wanting to cause trouble or seem unwilling to comply.
A male stepped forward from the trees, eyes narrowed at Sansa.
"Female, state your reason for coming onto this land."
"I'm looking for my mate."
His features instantly relaxed.
"I see. Follow me."
He glanced back at her, taking her in before shaking his head.
"Not me I guess." He smiled down at her.
Sansa felt her cheeks color at his blunt words.
"Oh no I um-..." her words trailed off, causing the male to look at her in confusion as she became lost in thought.
"I'll take you to the Alpha. We had a female come last week looking also, but she left the same day. I hope you're luckier in your search."
"Thank you."
Sansa took in the different houses of the pack, not looking away from the curious eyes as they watched her pass by.
"Feel free to look," the male said, his words again making Sansa blush.
She compared the life of this pack to the one she had grown up in. They seemed softer almost. Definitely smaller. Alpha Baxter had pushed for warriors and their training. Constantly throughout the day, sounds of fighting could be heard. It was why their pack had a doctor.
But here she could see no signs of such a thing. She heard nothing that indicated there was fighting.
They stopped in front of a large house, the largest one that stood in the middle of the pack itself. Sansa recognized it immediately to be the packhouse.
She had never been allowed inside her own packhouse and wondered silently if she would be able to see what the inside of this one looked like.
"Wait here."
Sansa sighed inwardly at that.
After a few moments of waiting, the door to the packhouse opened to show a male and female.
Sansa bowed her head, knowing almost instinctively that this was the Alpha and his Luna.
She looked up to see a kind smile on the Luna's face and an equally kind one from the male.
"Welcome," He said, "I'm told you're here on your search?"
Sansa paused and then shook her head.
Their kind smiles slipped off.
"You're not?"
Sansa took a step forward. At her movement, three other males rushed to her, barring their canines and letting low growls be heard from deep within their chests.
The Alpha's eyes were cold as he descended the steps.
"Are you a challenger?" He sounded doubtful in his own words but still said them.
Sansa shook her head and said, "No, I'm looking for my mate, but I- I've already met him I just- I'm trying to find him."
There was a long pause of confused silence as the Alpha turned to stare up at his Luna.
She cautiously descended down the steps, shaking her head at her mate before turning to the warriors and softly pushing them away.
She approached Sansa carefully, taking one of her hands in her own as she said in a gentle voice, "child...are you trying to tell us that your mate left you?"
Sansa pulled her hand back in horror.
"No! He didn't leave me, something happened to him and I'm looking for him now!"
"What has happened to him?" The Luna inquired softly.
"I- I don't know. That's why I'm trying to find him to see-,"
"When did you last see him?"
Sansa stared at the Luna, trying to clear her throat to stop the tears from coming to her eyes.
"The Summer Solstice."
The Luna's eyes turned into one of pity.
"What is your name?"
"Sansa."
"Sansa, are you hungry? Let's go into the packhouse and eat and talk about this- you can explain it all to me inside."
Sansa was tempted by her offer. She had never had a female figure to talk to and converse with. To share her feelings with. But there was something in the Luan's eyes that made her step back further. Something in her eyes that was similar to the look members of Alpha Braxton's pack would give her.
"Can you just answer this one question for me?"
The Luna nodded and smiled.
Sansa inhaled deeply, "Have you seen a male with skin like the darkness, and eyes silver like the moon?"
The Luna's smile fell as she stared at Sansa. She took a step towards her, extending her hand.
"Come inside with me child," she whispered, "No male like that exists."
Sansa turned around and ran.
She ran.
She ran.
She heard the shouts of the Alpha for her to stop.
And also the sounds of the Luna, commanding them to not harm her. To let her and her crazy mind go.
Sansa didn't know for how long she ran.
Hours it seemed. She stopped halfway, throwing up and feeling her lungs burn- her face burn with the tears that stung on her skin.
But she continued, not stopping until the comfort of the darkness came.
Then she fell to the forest floor, gasping for air, out of breath, unable to move.
She laid there the rest of the night, staring up at the stars and watering the ground with her tears.
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