Encounter
She brought Jennie back to the place that was once our home and pulled her into the bathroom under the dim yellow light. I stood outside, contemplating whether I should head in and watch a live performance.
Both of them were rare beauties so it wasn't such a big deal to lose a few years of my life to watch their performance.
A god must have known that I had separated this pair of lovers for almost ten years to satisfy my own selfish desire. This hidden god must be villainously smiling as He punishes me to watch the two of them live their sweet lives.
To a dead person, this was what they would consider as being unable to have a peaceful death.
Forget it. It's my karma.
After getting out of the bathroom, the two of them rolled on the sofa right before my eyes.
Nevermind this. I will watch since you're letting me see.
It was magnificent and enchanting as I had expected it to be.
I was shocked by how gently Lisa treated Jennie. It was something that I didn't dare to expect. I had even wondered if there was any part of Lisa that was gentle. The scene before me clearly shoved the sour grape logic into my face. Evidently, Lisa was able to be very gentle. She could make gentle moves full of love and was able to say sweet words of love.
It was clear that Lisa had only treated me with violence. She was practically relieving all of her resentment and dissatisfaction. She nipped and beat me; she tore and bit me.
Looking at Jennie now, I felt that I was very worthless again.
I was treated so badly. Why didn't I learn from my mistakes but instead insisted on taking this painful path?
I had pointlessly spent my life. It was utterly pointless.
The two of them had a warm and romantic time together until noon. Jennie got up because she had to work in the afternoon. She broke free from Lisa's hold and took out some ingredients from the fridge. Then she started cooking.
Is this fellow stupid? Why did she make jangeo-gui?
Lisa doesn't like eel.
After spending ten years with her, I had a clear grasp of her likes and dislikes. I understood her preferences more than anyone else.
However, the reality proved me wrong again.
Lisa obediently received the bowl and chopstick and happily ate with Jennie.
Damn it, Lisa, that's so unfair!
When I made it, she only ate one mouthful of it before throwing it away.
I had already started cooking when others were attending kindergarten. No matter what, my culinary skills should at least be better than the clumsy Jennie who mistook sugar as salt!
Forget it! Perhaps, Lisa would even drink poison if it was prepared by Jennie...
I was angry. I paced around Lisa, wanting to give her a punch.
I couldn't hit her. Ugh, I'm already dead but I still felt indignant. I might just level up from an earthbound spirit to a vengeful spirit.
I should probably start reciting scriptures and quickly ascend to heaven to become Buddha.
After Jennie left, Lisa threw away the grilled eel and her chopstick as I had expected. I felt gleeful. She didn't like eel after all. Her taste couldn't possibly experience a complete change just for Jennie.
She had always been someone who could endure. She could endure ten years by my side so how much would a few grilled eel amount to?
She slowly got up after lazing on the sofa.
She wandered around the large house in boredom before stopping in front of the door to my room. To be exact, the door to the room that was once mine.
When I had finally decided to leave, I thoroughly cleaned the room up. I had packed everything that I could.
She pushed the door open. Standing there, she faced the empty room. She stood there for a very long time, her eyes looking around.
I was just about to deceive myself when logic jumped out to mock me. Lisa was probably here to imagine how her future study room would look like.
Why do I always deceive myself? Actually, even if only 0.01% of her heart thought of me, my life might not have been so worthless after all.
After standing there for a long while, she suddenly turned around and returned to the living room. She found a thick stack of photo albums after crazily searching through the cabinet.
Then she started flipping through them. Actually, she wasn't just flipping through the album. She was basically picking out all the photos that we took together and throwing them on the floor.
Do you have to be so cruel? I don't think I was as evil as the Ten Evils .
Before I died, I knew that she absolutely didn't love me but I would never have expected that she would hate me to such an extent.
I admit that I had coerced her to stay with me and the things that I had done weren't the best. But for the past ten years, I had taken good care of her and did whatever she wanted me to. I don't think that I did anything that was especially cruel to her. On the contrary, I was badly abused by her.
In any case, we were once people who had slept together. We had spent so much time together but where were your feelings? Did you have to be so cruel?
She actually wanted to erase all traces of my existence. If I knew this was going to happen, I shouldn't have wasted my efforts to pack up my stuff in order to show her that I had left home. I had packed up so much and had moved to my brother's villa only to commit suicide. Not only did I dumped a bunch of sundries for my brother to clean up, I even polluted the new house he bought with evil energy.
My brother was so unlucky to have to take care of a sister like me.
I wouldn't have wasted my efforts to pack up my useless items if I had known that Lisa hated me so much that she wouldn't even let a photo off. I should have let her sell my items and our photos as junk. At the very least, she would have to spare her energy to do so and I can relieve some of my anger.
The photos that contained my happy memories were mercilessly dropped onto the floor by her thin hands. Those were the hands that I had once loved.
"You heartless bastard." I pointed at her nose and scolded her but I felt depressed that she wouldn't be able to hear me.
Even though our happy memories were fake, I had thought that there would be at least two or three that were real.
I got her disdain after paying my entire life for love; I don't get it.
Lisa took out a box. After throwing in all of the photos, she randomly placed it outside the door. Then she went back in and laid down on the sofa.
She was obviously too lazy to even look at it.
I squatted beside the box to cherish my treasure one last time.
I wasn't able to pick the photos up so I could only look at the top few that were facing up.
In one of the photos, the background was white in colour. She hugged me from behind and there was a pot of ominous chrysanthemum on the table by theside.
It was Incheon Medical Center.
It was the day before our trainees day evaluation during our first year in high school. We managed to make it into the finals and the finals were held at the Plaza Wars. We decided to tour around Incheon city for a few days before the evaluation. We were not familiar with the area since it was the first time we were there.
We met a group of students on our way back when we went out for supper. We were still young and arrogant back then. We wanted to act like heroes when they had only wanted to bully us.
Seeing that we were roughly about the same size, we didn't think much of the students and started fighting them but someone on their side was carrying a knife.
How could I continue watching when I saw that person launching at Lisa with that silver object? I stood in front of Lisa without thinking.
I finally got the knife off of her hand and chased them away but there was a large cut on my chest. I didn't take it seriously at that time even though it was very painful. I found that my chest was wounded after I reached the hospital and was given a checkup; I could no longer sing on the stage.
I was stupefied as I listened to the doctor's words. I didn't know whether I was shaken or confused.
I was only thinking about one thing: what should I do now that I can't sing? Lisa was the best dancer and Irene was the best rapper. I didn't have a deep love for music. However, watching Lisa singing and dancing was the meaning to my existence.
The 'Joohyun, daebak' smile that I would see was suddenly gone. What should I do?
Lisa mentioned this afterwards but I promise that I wasn't acting disappointed to make her feel guilty and to force her to feel like she owed me in order to keep her by my side. I wasn't doing something like that at that point in time.
I didn't go so far as to use such a method to keep her by my side forever.
Though, I probably used a much more despicable method afterwards.
At that time, Lisa told me that there was no point in her staying if I wasn't beside her.
I had to admit that I felt ecstasy from the bottom of my heart after I heard that from her.
I had such an ugly heart.
I wasn't able to watch the finals. I heard that Lisa fought really hard but still didn't make it.
Although she failed, Lisa made a good impression in the competition. The vocal coach came to have a talk with her but she said that she was actually not interested in music and wished to study hard for university.
Afterwards, there were many times where I saw her secretly crying as she hugged the pillow. She was different from me because she really loved music. To me, the meaning of music was Lisa. Music was nothing to me without her.
I only wanted to chase after her and watch her figure from the back as she energetically and brightly ran on the stage. I played only to hear that one sentence from her, "With Irene besides me, I felt assured."
I destroyed her dream and I made use of her guilt. At the time, I wasn't able to bravely tell her that she should continue, that she could still fly high on a music industry without me.
Afterwards, there were countless times where I detested my despicable self.
It was only natural that god wouldn't let a person like me live a happy life. I quickly received the punishment that I deserved.
If I hadn't used my injury as an excuse to monopolize Lisa's warmth and insisted on staying in the hospital for so long, we wouldn't have met Jennie there.
She was pushing me through the grassfield at the hospital for a walk under the magnificent sun that day
I cawed non-stop like a crow. I bet she wasn't properly listening to me. She soon came to a stop. I followed her line of sight after feeling her absent mindedness.
Jennie was wearing a silly striped patient gown and sleeping on a white chair. She looked otherworldly. The sunlight dyed her hair with a chestnut colour and she was glowing faintly. She looked like an angel when she slept. She looked so pale and transparent, it was as if she would break apart with one touch.
A woman's instinct was also terrifying. The moment I saw Jennie, as well as the way Lisa was looking at her, I could roughly guess the frustrating outcome that I would ultimately experience.
Who would have expected a love cupid to be wandering around the hospital with his bow? He must have laughed so much when he saw me, someone who didn't deserve to be shot by him. I had instead shot myself on the foot to become their matchmaker.
There were some things that were determined by fate. If it didn't belong to you, you can't obtain it.
—■—
a/n:
Ten Evils are :
1. Killing
2. Stealing
3. Sexual misconduct
4. Lying
5. Slandering
6. Harsh speech
7. Vain talk
8. Covetousness
9. Ill-will
10. False belief
Do Good. Avoid evils. Purify your mind. Don't read yadom. Eh.
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: ZingTruyen.Xyz